It’s hard to find a word that starts with x…and xylophone doesn’t always fit.

All the things I say and do,

being sound enough in mind,

cause me to question my life and

direction. I constantly look for an

escape route and think it out,

fearing the effects too much to act.

Good people don’t think like I do:

holding on to the past like a life line.

It’s only a matter of time before I crash,

just a short time till I collapse.

Keep putting one foot down, then the other.

Look people in the eye.

Mimic happiness so they don’t suspect.

No where were you guaranteed joy

Or even contentment as a consolation.

Perhaps it is best not to think about it…

Quickly turn your thoughts to other things.

Resist the urge to ponder over; it will

sink you so low, you might never rise.

Tomorrow may be different.

Ugly or not, it’s all there is.

Violent and unforgiving truth

waits in the wings, the

extent of its damage unknown. Is the

zenith of life past?  Am I headed downhill?

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